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To love God and to love his people

The Gospel when studied gives us such great understanding of God’s love for us. I remember my very first memory verse as a child was John 3:16. For God so loved the world that he gave us his beloved son. Such great love! We are often reminded that God loves us through his word and as we continue to be taught of his love in the church. I was fairly new to my now home church when my pastor said the mission of the church for new members was to love God, love his people, and make disciples. I have fixated my thoughts this week on what it means to love God and his people. Often times we get so enamored by God’s love, which is great! But we then forget that we are to love him and love his people. How then do we love God and love his people?

Loving God

Loving God should be easy, at least that is what I think. God’s love is not something we have to earn because it is given freely. Why then do people find it hard to love him? Well, there are several things that can stop us from loving God, but I will share the obvious one which is the sinful nature of man. It can be quite hard to love God when sin pulls us away from knowing God and inevitably loving him. Another thing that makes it hard for us to love God is loving him wholeheartedly. There are many competing things in our lives that can easily distract us from fully loving God. But to love God requires all of our heart and not some of it. (read Mark 12:30). I think of David when it comes to loving God, a man after God’s own heart. Was David sinful? yes, aren’t we all? But his heart ran after God relentlessly even in his sin, he loved God. The Psalmist as he is fondly known, through his many highs and lows showed us how to love God. How then can we love God;

  • Be obedient to God’s commands
  • Be intentional with your time spent daily with God (in your waking, your work, your routine tasks) make God part of your day.
  • Love his people.
  • Intimately pray to him, no need to rush. Have a conversation with God.
  • Like David, worship and praise him at every chance you get.
  • Mediate on his word and allow him to bring a greater understanding of it to you.
  • Love him with all of your heart!

It is quite obvious that God desires to have a relationship with you. His love for you is readily available. Love God just like David, even in the highs and lows of your life, it does make a greater difference to love and be loved by God.

Loving his people

Do you know that by loving God’s people, you love him too? God commands us in his word to love one another (read Mark 12:31). The question is how do we love others if the others do not love us back? We love them anyway! Unlike God’s love that is freely given, sometimes we do not love like God does, we instead hold back our love for others. We allow resentment towards others to take precedence over loving them. We only love those who love us, but God says to love even our enemies! It is all people! The temptation to not love others can be so easily done because, unlike God, people are flawed and because of this we conclude it is perfectly okay to be loveless towards the other. But if you read your bible, you know that this is not true. The Bible shares many stories where people did not love each other and what happened later was nothing to desire. The envy of brothers led to them selling their brother into slavery. The hate towards God’s people kept them enslaved for 400 years. The deceit of receiving God’s blessing led to sibling rivalry. I could go on and on to show you how not loving one another is destructive. We can pull from all these examples and see why it is important for us to love one another. So then how do we love God’s people;

  • Pray for others. (This includes your enemies!)
  • Serve one another with integrity.
  • Extend compassion to others.
  • Do not judge others.
  • Forgive those who have wronged us.
  • Give to others sincerely.
  • Work towards living in peace with others

If you are like me and you try to imagine a world where everyone loves one another as commanded by God, that love for others can start with you and become a reality. I can admit that I sometimes fail to love others as commanded and ask God to help me love others as he does, even my enemies. I don’t always get it right, but I still seek God’s help when loving others. You can do the same too! Keep this verse in your thoughts as you love God and his people.

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul (life), and with all your mind (thought, understanding), and with all your strength.’ This is the second: ‘You shall [unselfishly] [a]love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these. - Mark 12:30-31-

It is the greatest command after all! To love God and to love his people! It is time for you to take your rightful place. It is time to trade thorns for crowns.

Much love,

Xholiwe

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The purpose of stagnant waters

When we think of stagnant waters, we don’t think of things that are fresh and alive. On the contrary, we think of the dangers of stagnant water bodies and some of us follow the instructions not to be near or in stagnant water bodies. It is for our health anyway, right? According to my Google search, stagnant waters are a breeding ground for insects and bacteria that carry diseases, the water is filled with dead things and water-borne diseases thrive in these waters. What good can come from stagnant waters? In a physical and literal sense, nothing good can come from stagnant waters. For the purpose of this blog, I wanted to use stagnant water as an illustration of our spiritual stagnation. While we know nothing good comes from it in the physical, what good can come from stagnant waters in your spiritual life? If any?! What can God do with your stagnant waters and make them purposeful?

What is stagnant water in the spiritual life?

Similar to actual stagnant waters, there are many dangers of us coming near or in these types of waters. The stagnant water in a spiritual aspect is the death of faith and hope. With the death of faith and hope, there is a high likelihood that sin and doubt breed and start to grow in our lives. In a spiritual sense because of the death of faith and hope there is no longer any movement on our spiritual walk. The waters don’t move, so don’t we. The Bible does instruct us to not get into stagnant water, a place where faith and hope die, but many of us find ourselves there for so many reasons. Here are a few of them; hurt/disappointment, loss, fear, complacency, self-righteousness, and laziness. What was the reason that made you get into stagnant waters? In other words, what killed your faith and hope?

When it starts to STINK

Stagnant waters eventually start to stink. If you have ever walked past a place with stagnant waters, you know exactly what I am talking about. It is quite hard to ignore the awful smell. In many similarities with stagnant waters in our spiritual lives, our stagnant paddles of water begin to stink. We can spend all our lives ignoring the smell of it, and allow people around us to also get affected by the smell of it. If there are people who love you well, they will let you know it stinks and they can all smell it. They may even encourage you to clean up and get rid of the smell. However, it does come down to you deciding if you want to live your life void of faith and hope, and instead allowing sin and doubt to thrive within you. Here is where you may want to think what is the purpose of this stagnant water if nothing good comes from it? All you have is sin and doubt and whatever little faith and hope you had is dead. You are unable to move forward but sit there in misery. I understand where you are because I too have been there where stagnant water seemed like a better place to live my life. I knew what my Bible said about how life without faith and hope feels and looks like, but I had already killed it enough. Death surrounded me, where could I bring back to life faith and hope while I tried to move in unmovable water? Well, this is where the purpose of stagnant water steps in!

The purpose of stagnant water

Stagnant waters save as a reminder to tell us this is not where we used to be. We are reminded that there was a time when our lives were filled with faith and hope. Understandably, some circumstances killed our faith and hope, but surely this is not where you want to remain. If the awful smell of sin and doubt eventually gets to you, you then decide enough is enough! It is time to get back to thriving in living waters. If you have lived long enough in stagnant waters, stepping out will not be easy, in fact, it will be quite scary. But there is good news! You do not have to do this alone! Someone has been waiting for you to get out of there, his name is Jesus Christ. And to ease you into stepping out, he starts with you small, he is not even trying to overwhelm you.

In his word from Matthew 17:20, he says your faith can be as tiny as a mustard seed. Think with me for a second, a mustard seed is extremely tiny and that is what can help you get out of these stagnant waters? You can’t pass up this offer! Activate your faith and allow Jesus to bring you out of these waters you have made your home. After you have activated your faith remember that you can’t take your sin and doubt where there is life, those things can not thrive in living waters. Repent from your sin and doubt and begin to build your faith and hope in Jesus. It will surprise you how much making this decision will greatly impact your life. So do you still think only bad things come from stagnant water now? Well, I hope not, because many of us came out of stagnant water, and Jesus our living water turned things around for us. We are no longer surrounded by dead things, but life and, we can move freely!

Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them

John 7:38 (NIV)

This verse reminds us that there is a way out of our stagnant waters, and it is through believing in Jesus. In other words, it is having faith and hope in Jesus. There is hope that once we taste the living water, no longer shall we thirst for the old stinky waters (Read John 4 v 10-14). Now that is some good news! I urge you to step out from those stagnant waters, there is hope on the other side. It is time for you to take your rightful place! It is time to trade thorns for crowns.

Much love,

Xholiwe

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Studying the word: The crucial need for it in the Christian walk

I was just a few weeks into my walk with the Lord when I realized I did not have my personal Bible. Just like every new Christian, I was eager to get the word in my heart and start on my journey with the Lord. I remember praying and asking the Lord that I wanted to study his word and could use my own personal Bible. It was not before long this wonderful couple came to my workplace and gave me a spanking new study Bible. I still remember the feeling of joy and realizing that God wanted me to start immediately. My own personal Bible, mint, blue, and white, and that irresistible new Bible smell. I thanked this amazing couple for such a perfect gift and an answer to my prayers. I couldn’t wait to get home so I could start using my Bible. I rushed home to check my new study Bible out and in the moment it felt like the words were lifting off the page and they were so tangible, I immediately started on the “read the Bible in a year plan” that was part of my study Bible. This Bible was filled with highlights, you would tell it was a Bible that was constantly being used. I was finding new truths, and I was excited about expanding my knowledge in my new walk.

Unfortunately, I started to get too caught up in my own life issues, work, and school (I was a college student then) so like many of us, my perfect gift, and answered prayer was shelved with the many other books unread for some time. If I was studying the Bible then, I moved from that to a quick read and glance if possible. I was not studying the word anymore, and it was quite evident in the many things I didn’t fully understand. I know we can fall into this because life does get busy and sometimes the Bible is the last thing on our minds. But please hear me out, we need the word in us and can no longer make it the least of our priorities. Studying the word is crucial to understanding why we are walking with God and staying sustained in our walk with him.

reading versus Studying the word

I will try to use some of my college experience to help us see the difference between reading and studying. In some of my structured classes, I would be given reading assignments weekly throughout the semester and those were great supplements to prepare me to know the context of the subject matter. Eventually, there would be a final exam, and this required me to study the material so I could prove that understood the material. So think context equals reading and study equals understanding. It might be hard to differentiate the two because both reading and studying the word of the Lord are good for the Christian walk. Think of the time you read a wonderful Bible story and connected with the characters, great right? it was a nice read and similar to a novel there was no further need for you to dig deep. Then think of the time you read the same Bible story and sought a deeper meaning to it, you may have even cross-checked with other verses and even read a commentary or two. This time you went beyond just knowing the characters and connecting, you were seeking a deeper understanding of the whole story. When you read the Bible, you can get some context, which is great! However, when you study the Bible you are studying to understand in depth the meaning of it all.

Why is STUDYING THE WORD IMPORTANT

What has been the setback for many of us Christians is having the context, but lacking the depth of the meaning. Studying the word helps us expand our knowledge beyond the context. When we move beyond the context and start to look at the word in a more introspective and meditative way, not only do we gain a better understanding of it, but it helps us better understand ourselves. It is a living word after all! (read Hebrews 4:12). I think of the Bible when we study and examine it, it also examines us. When we study the Bible in-depth, we begin to deepen our relationship with God. With deeper studying, God is not just a character in the book we just read and feel connected to, but he becomes more real to us. I was once a Bible illiterate, and that got me into trouble because all I had was context, so it was quite easy for me to believe something else aside from the actual word. Hence studying the word will safeguard you from falsehood the world does a great job at showing us. The depth of your study shields you and guides you through your Christian walk. It all comes down to seeing God in all of it, the redemptive plan for all of us, and our part in this plan.

How can you study the Word?

The word must be studied with much to consider, remember this is not just for context. You are seeking a deeper meaning here not just a feel-good story. You would want to consider the times, the situation, the reasons, the people, the purpose, and eventually the meaning. This will take you some time to pull all this as you study versus when you read, so make the time for it all. Other things you can do are;

  • Be intentional about your study time, you would have to make time in your schedule for devotional time. (don’t shelve your Bible and let it collect dust)
  • Study different subjects or books of the Bible (for example if you want to study faith; read verses related to faith and use those to help you better understand what God means by faith in depth)
  • Study with others – it will surprise you what you may have missed when someone else shares their study with you. You can do this in a Bible study setting or even a Sunday school class.
  • Supplement your study time with commentaries. These should be biblically sound commentaries. Not every commentary you find on Google is biblically sound. Look out for those.
  • Pray! Yes, pray. Ask God to give you a deeper meaning of his word as you study so you can understand it.
  • Don’t keep this word to yourself! if you understand something from your deep study, share it with the world, it will surprise you how many people it can touch.

sHOW YOURSELF APPROVED BY God

After you study and understand, you want to be approved by God. Remember how I mentioned earlier that through studying and examining the word it also examines us? Once there is an introspective of yourself in alignment with the Word, you would want to take what you have studied and apply that to your walk with Christ. So that when God sees you, he sees the practical word in you. From the pages to living it out in your walk daily, to seeking more of his word for your continued spiritual growth.

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

2 Timothy 2:15

It is time for you to take your rightful place, it is time to trade thorns for crowns!

Much love,

Xholiwe

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You were running a good race: Get back on track

Everyone has their favorite book of the Bible and mine happens to be Galatians amongst many others. I recently read a couple verses with a friend and spent some time reflecting on some of the verses. The entirety of this book emphasizes that people must have faith in Jesus Christ and Paul tells us of the freedom experienced when we live a life of faith in Christ over the law. The Galatians welcome his teaching on faith and freedom in Christ at the start and are doing so well, but unfortunately, in chapters 3 and 4 Paul begins to have concerns about them turned back from what he taught them. He addresses them and pleads with them not to turn back, why would they turn back? they were doing so well. (read Galatians 3:1-4; 4: 8-20).

We too are no different from the Galatians, we have received the teaching and know it to be true that there is freedom when we live our lives by having faith in Christ Jesus, but just as the Galatians, we can get persuaded to think otherwise and turn our backs on the truth. So I ask us the same question Paul asked the Galatians, Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? (Galatians 5:7 NIV)

YOU were running a good race

If you are like me and love to occasionally watch the Olympic track runners, then you might know what a good race looks like. Almost every race starts with the runner in the assigned tracks and all are signaled to start. There is usually a crowd watching in the bleachers and you can hear the many cheers as the runners accelerate. These runners have trained and put in their effort for this final moment, nothing should go bad as they sprint through their lane. It would be so disheartening to see your favorite track runner stumble and fall because someone cut into their lane. But it does happen and when it does you ask yourself what went wrong? They were doing so well! Paul must have felt the exact same way when he watched the Galatians stumble and fall.

Paul watched the Galatians train and put in their effort, he then watched them start to run their races and for a moment there, they were doing so well, and he excitedly cheered them on. He would hope that they would make it to the very end, knowing the obeying the truth he taught them. I can imagine his disappointment as he saw one after another trip and fall. He said to them, “You were running a good a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth?” We know who cut on the Galatians and made them trip and fall, but how about us? What is cutting in on us?

I think of my very own race and let’s be clear Paul uses running races quite a bit as a way to describe our spiritual journey. So let us not confuse the two as we think even about our own races (our spiritual journey). In my spiritual journey, I experienced times when I was slowed down, completely distracted, came to a stop, and was persuaded by other things. It is quite easy than you think to be persuaded by these other things, the things that cut in on us as we journey with the truth we know. Paul says that these persuasions do not come from he who calls us in verse 8 of chapter 5. Who is the “he” that Paul talks about? It is Jesus, Jesus does not call us to these different persuasions that draw us away from him. But we do get persuaded by people and things, and recognizing these persuasions is important so that you can know when you are getting off track. I know I am getting off track when I;

  1. Start to revert back to my old ways. The old ways Jesus set me free from, I begin to think and act on them.
  2. Feed into the lies of the enemy that contradict God’s word over me.
  3. Give into believing something else (ideologies) contrary to what I know is truth.
  4. Find ways to justify my wrongdoings and get comfortable with continuously doing wrong.
  5. Neglect the word of God and stop spending time in it.
  6. When I worry more and pray less.
  7. Allow my selfish ambitions and desires to overtake me and I end up losing sight of Jesus.
  8. Surround myself with people who don’t care about their spiritual journey with Jesus.

I could keep going with the list, but these are just a few of the things that can persuade us away from the truth we know. It is important now to allow these persuasions to take us away from the freedom we get to experience in knowing Jesus. We steadfastly walk with the Lord through it all (read my other blog on steadfastly walking with the Lord). How can you maintain your truth in a world full of persuasions?

  1. You stand firm on the truth that you know. Your belief in Jesus Christ should not be easily swayed.
  2. You used the word of God as you practical application to how you live your life.
  3. You immediately become aware of when you begin to get out of track.
  4. You study the word of God and hide his word in your heart.
  5. You practice your faith and remain disciplined in it.
  6. You pray earnestly.
  7. You surround yourself with people that believe in your faith and will also help you grow spiritually.
  8. You repent of your old ways and get back on track.

Run your spiritual race well and stay focused on the goal to win the race set before you! This race you can not do on your own or even worse allow people and things to cut in on you. You have found a new freedom as you live your life in with faith in Jesus Christ. Let it not be taken away from you. Guard it with your heart, don’t be easily persuaded by things that do not come from him. Instead, be persuaded by the things of the Lord. Steadfastly walk with the Lord knowing that he will guide you as you journey through this life. It is time to take your rightful place! It is time for you to trade thorns for crowns!

Much love,

Xholiwe

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Letting go of your regret: When you can not take back what happened

Not too long ago I sat down feeling such an immersed amount of regret as I recollected a situation that I thought was in my past. The more my thoughts replayed the situation, the more I sank into this place of wishing I could reverse the hands of time. I immediately felt trapped by this regret and deeply thought of how this situation did not only hurt me, but it hurt others. Like a fresh-cut wound, I felt a rush of emotion that caused me to break down. I asked the Lord, I thought I let this go, I thought I moved on, but why then do I feel this way? At that moment I hoped to get an immediate response, but it was just me and my thoughts of regret for a while. I know that I am not the only one who has felt this way, I want to assume we have all been in a place where thoughts of regret flooded our minds, and letting go of these thoughts of regret felt nearly impossible, but thanks to God he surely has a way out for us all. Let us together look into letting go of regret for the things that we could not take back.

When regret is louder than Grace

It can be hard to let go of regret when there is a constant reminder of our mistakes and failures. When thoughts of regret play louder in our minds we forget the grace God freely has given us. Letting go of regret starts with knowing God’s grace for us. No one works harder than the enemy to keep us away from this because he would rather the regrets permanently play in our minds, making it impossible to let go. Satan would rather you live in shame and guilt instead of walking in the forgiveness of God and the freely given grace through Christ Jesus. When the enemy wants to amplify all your regrets, run to Christ. He wants to condemn you, but unfortunately for him, he can not keep you there because in Christ Jesus there is no condemnation. (Romans 8:1).

forgiveness and its role in letting go of regret

There is a lot of forgiving to do in most regrettable situations. When we do not forgive, ourselves and the people we may have hurt, or those who hurt us, we easily can stay trapped in feelings of regret. It is almost like walking around with an open wound and hoping we do not bleed. Of course, you will bleed if you go around with an open wound, so then you will need a covering to stop the bleeding. Our cover for this wound would be forgiveness. If you want to let go of regret forgiveness plays this role. It covers you and allows you to heal and move forward. If it was for your mistakes and failures seek Jesus and if it is because others hurt you forgive them. (Matthew 6:14).

mOVING FORWARD AFTER REGRET

Regret is a humbling way to remind us of God’s redemption. He gives us a way forward from all our regrets. It is not just with us, many people in the Bible too had regrets. God’s very first creation of mankind Adam and Eve had deep regrets about eating that fruit and leaving the garden. Abraham and Sara regretted having a child outside their marriage even after God’s promise to bless them. King David had many regrets, just read Psalms. I could go on with this list of biblical figures who like us experienced regret, but what all of us have in common is God’s redemption that moved them forward. They could have easily dwelled on their regrets, but if we want to use them as an example, we could learn from them. They moved forward with faith in God knowing he had a redemptive plan for them, God has a redemptive plan for us too! We no longer have to hold on to our regrets, but we can look forward to what is ahead. Here is what Paul has to say:

13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3: 13-14

Regret is behind us, we are graced by God to move forward through Christ Jesus. I just don’t want you to think that letting go of regret is an easy thing to do. For some knowing of God’s grace, forgiving, and realizing there is a redemptive plan can take a while, months even years. However, if you want to start to let go of regret make it a mandatory act to run to Christ when to spend too much of your time recollecting your regrets. Proceed to seeking forgiveness and forgiving others and not dwelling on your regrets. You surely can not take back what happened but you can surely trust God to work all things for your good, might I say, even your regrets! (Romans 8:28). It is time for you to take your rightful place, it is time to trade thorns for crowns!

Much love,

Xholiwe

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The Grumbling Christian: Is it right for you to be angry?

Hello Crowned Royals! This blog post I am sharing with you today is several months late, but better late than never like my mom would always say. I remember thinking about this several times when I caught myself grumbling, and if you were doing it too, I would hope this would help you. Yes, I have grumbled several times and I am a Christian, I know we have all been there. In a world full of grumblers, it is quite easy to find yourself complaining even when you know all so well that you have a God that provides. I found myself grumbling way too many times last year, and last year was not too long ago, so clearly I have some work to do. So let us do the work together! The million-dollar question for the grumbling Christian is; “Is it right for you to be angry? This was the exact question God asked Jonah right after Jonah grumbled at him (read Jonah 4 v 4). So why did God ask Jonah this question? and why would God today ask you this exact question?

pROVISION AND CONTENTMENT

If you read the entire chapter 4 in the book of Jonah, there are two big things you need to notice between God and Jonah in this chapter, it is provision and contentment. Then soon after the provision and contentment comes the grumbling from Jonah. We may want to know how possible is it that one was provided for and was content, but quickly grumbled? Well, similar to Jonah, we have been provided for by God, and with God’s provision we then found contentment, but what happens when that is suddenly taken away from us? or the next provision does not come in our scheduled time? We grumble and in many instances believe it is right for us to be angry. Just think about the time when things were going in your favor and suddenly the unexpected happened, how was your approach? were you like Jonah grumbling at God or were you leaning towards knowing that God would provide just like he did before? I personally have done both and the times that I grumbled at God, I found this approach made me less content, and the more I grumbled, the more I felt anger and frustration towards the situation. It certainly is an unhealthy approach to handling situations, even for you. Take it from me who has found herself grumbling far too many times. You have a better chance of coming to a place of contentment for your situation when you spend less time grumbling.

The biggest understanding when it comes to provision and contentment is that it comes from God. The minute we start to grumble, we tell God in our grumbling that we prefer our comfort and how dare he take that away from us. We get angry and miss the lesson. And just like with Jonah, God is teaching us to not allow our grumbling to overshadow God’s provision for us and to also find our contentment in him.

Aren’t I DESERVING?

The argument of old times is that as a Christian I am deserving of all things good and indeed you are! You serve a God that provides even when you are not deserving. But when it happens that you do not have the provision, do not be quick to grumble and turn away in anger from God. Many have missed God’s next provision, assignment, and confirmation because they reasonably concluded that if the situation was not good then it is best to walk away from God grumbling in anger. Do not walk away in anger just yet! Think about the Israelites in the wilderness for a second with me. Evidently, they were miraculously provided time and time again by God, but that did not stop them from grumbling. How can people who have seen God provide in several miraculous ways still grumble? But we do this too, we quickly forget how God provided for us not too long ago in several situations that seemed impossible. Yet we grumble and if we are not careful with this, we go from grumbling to resentment.

HOW CAN A STOP GRUMBLING?

There is no formula that will magically stop us from grumbling, but there are several practical steps you can take that could help you. I will share some that have worked for me and I pray it helps you too;

  1. Continued gratitude to God – constantly reminding yourself of how God provided for you in other situations.
  2. Finding contentment in my current situation (even the unfavorable ones)
  3. Catching yourself when you start to grumble and acknowledging it sooner than later.
  4. Constantly reminding yourself that situations do change.
  5. Being angry and frustrated at God does not make the situation any better

The list is not long, but if you are like me and you want to stop with the grumbling then I will leave this here for you.

I know it can be hard to see God sometimes in these difficult situations we have to handle through life’s journey. It may feel like grumbling is easier when we are faced with unfavorable situations, but might I borrow the words of one apostle who in all situations found his provision and contentment in God. Even when he was arrested, Apostle Paul wrote this in a Roman Dungeon;

10 I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. 11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4 v 10-13

May God renew his concern for your current situation so that you are not found grumbling, but instead finding contentment in his provision for you. It is time for you to take your right place, it is time to trade thorns for crowns!

Much Love,

Xholiwe

Posted on by thornstocrowns

Perseverance: New starts and stronger finishes

Photo by yang miao on Unsplash

Dear Crowned Royals, I bring you all the missed-year greetings from 2022 and share the joy of the new year with you! It has been a while since I last shared on here and I think now may be a good time for me to come out of hiding. We still have some work to do and I do hope God has been helping us through it all.

It is a start of a new year and we are all hoping for a great year, you know a year without the trials and tribulations. No one at the start of a new year wants to hear the word perseverance, because this word is associated with difficulty and by definition requires too much from us. I do hope that with this post you may look at perseverance a little differently and see the hope we build through it.

Why do we need to persevere?

Let me start off with a practical example that explains the need for us to persevere. A young man just graduated college and after several tries managed to score a final interview with his dream job. All he needs to do is drive downtown to seal the deal. He plans to get there on time and ensures his car has enough gas to get him there. He heads out to the city and traffic is flowing, he even may have some spare time to freshen up before his interview. Nothing should go wrong at this point, but then several cars ahead of him, an accident occurs and this slows traffic. What was supposed to be an easy drive to an interview becomes a difficult one as the young man tries to move around the traffic so he can make it to his job interview. All his efforts seem impossible and the spare time to possibly freshen up becomes less and less. To make things worse his phone battery power left won’t allow him to make a call to explain his delay. This interruption could cost him losing a position he has been hoping for, does he stay in the traffic until he makes it to the interview or turns back and drives back home because all hope is lost? Many of you I want to assume would say he stays the traffic until he makes it right? I agree, he keeps going knowing that not all hope is lost and that with this seemingly difficult new start, there is a possible stronger finish.

We need perseverance because with it we make it through any and many of life’s difficult interruptions. Perseverance is the longevity of our hope that allows us to keep going even when situations seem impossible. God calls us to do so knowing that through perseverance, he has the opportunity to bless us and build our character. After one has experienced difficult circumstances and through it all continues to steadfastly persevere, one gains incredible strength to face life’s challenges as they come. The need to preserve typically starts when our life seemingly perfect life is interrupted and easily affects our wellness be it physical, emotional, or spiritual. It could be that you may have lost a loved one, missed a job opportunity, or received a bad doctor’s report and the list goes on. There are so many challenges in life that temporary hope cannot keep us going even if we tried. We then look to perseverance knowing that as we hold on to it all, we get to stay strong and most importantly finish strong despite the difficult life circumstances.

New starts and stronger finishes

There is this famous quote we come across online often or have heard others that says that “it is not how you start that is important, but how you finish.” Starting can be hard, and holding on to hope at the initial start of a life challenge can even be harder. Look at this new, not-so-pleasant start for you as a way to stand the test of time and come out stronger. Making the choice to persevere even at what seems like defeat allows us to pick ourselves back up again and again with every other life challenge we are dealt with. Call it a ripple effect, but once a person perseveres through a couple of life lows, it builds them for the next. Obviously, at the start of it, one does not recognize the strength they continue to build as they keep choosing to keep going despite it all. There are quite a few more other great things we gain as we continue to persevere, but one thing I would like to mention is how we grow in patience. It is a great fruit of the spirit after all and makes a seemingly difficult or delayed situation so much better. With patience and perseverance, you are well on your way to a stronger finish. Don’t give up just yet because a stronger finish is why you have held on so long. Some of you have been persevering for a while now, but hold on. What does a strong finish look like? Well, it looks like you coming out on the other side still trusting, still hoping, and still believing that this life challenge will change. Despite the many setbacks, obstacles, hurts, frustrations, and delays, you will be able to see a turnaround of things because you choose to persevere. And because you have chosen to do so, God has this promise for you;

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

James 1:12 NIV

Please find comfort in knowing that your efforts to persevere are blessed by God. He knows that it is never an easy start, but just like you he hopes for a stronger finish. He wants the opportunity to bless you because you stood the test. One story that came to mind of God’s blessing to those that persevere is the story of Job. Wow! Job had some serious seemingly impossible life challenges, but through it all, he kept his hope and persevered through every test. He was greatly blessed by God, all he lost was doubled, and now that is a strong finish. While you think about your own life challenges, take some time to read or reflect on Job’s perseverance experience and see if there are things you can adapt for your own experience.

Stay encouraged! There is a stronger finish that awaits you, do not be discouraged by the start of it at all. Perseverance is the longevity of our hope and it is something you can do. I pray God helps you through it all so that you too can be blessed by him. It is time for you to take your rightful place, it is time for you to trade thorns for crowns.

Much love,

Xholiwe

Posted on by thornstocrowns

On the other side of frustration: The Assurance of Jesus

It was at least my 8th time attempting to make things work so I could move on with my work, but sometimes technology has a way of giving up on you especially when it knows you really need it. I had a deadline at work and this particular software chose the wrong day to not function. Did I mention I had a deadline? In my many attempts to make things work before the end of the workday, I was trying everything possible and with each attempt, my patience began to run thin and by my 8th attempt, I was frustrated. With absolutely no control over what was going on, I gave into my frustrations so I slammed my laptop, and slapped my hands over my face to express my frustration. I bet this sounds familiar to most of you, frustration is quite the emotion, right? I oftentimes think of frustration as that annoying deep itch you can’t reach in the middle of your back and if you are without help, you sit there with it in hopes that it will go away and it doesn’t. I want us to talk about the deep itch called frustration and how best we can get through it without losing ourselves.

REcognizing your frustration

I, first of all, would like to confirm with you that you are not the first and certainly will not be the last to experience frustration. Even the people of old were quite frustrated with their lives and situations, just most of us are at times. Frustration has a way of showing up when people are unable to attain what they personally what to fulfill. In the same way, it also in some way makes people feel like they have lost control over their own lives. A perfect example of worldwide shared frustration was with the COVID-19 pandemic. A lot of us experienced many frustrations due to the limitation and little control we had over the course of the pandemic. With these many frustrations being experienced, it was almost impossible to see the other side of our frustrations and be assured by God that things will go back to normal prior to the pandemic.

When we as humans get frustrated we are often consumed by the need to take back control and find stability by whatever means possible, let us face it, we love to be comfortable. We witnessed that a lot during the early months of the pandemic, might I remind you of all the bulk-buying of toilet paper and cleaning supplies (Yikes)? However, when we are frustrated, it is almost like that comfort is taken away from us and then we get so fixated on how we can get back to our comfort without finding the proper help to help us get on the other side of it all. Understandably, we all find ways to cope with our day-to-day frustrations, but there are long-term frustrations, people, still, experience and those types need the help of Jesus in order to get on the other side. Examples of long term frustrations are plenty, but here are a few; persons frustrated from the lack of career fulfillment, persons frustrated from the lack of having a baby after many years of trying, persons frustrated from many failed relationships, persons frustrated from a terminal illness, persons frustrated from the lack of sufficient funds to pay off debt…..I mean the list can go on, but these are some long-term frustrations that need the assurance of Jesus if we ever want to get to the other side of things. Notice how I mentioned “the lack of” in all the long-term frustration examples? I was not writing that just so I could flow with the text, long-term frustration are often times experienced due to the lack of something for prolonged periods of time. Unlike everyday work frustrations that can be fixed by the IT guy or sharing notes with your co-worker, long-term frustrations can be a tough thing to live through, and to some, they may feel impossible to overcome, but can I encourage you? I will share this famous Bible story and I hope it helps you see that on the other side of your frustration is the help and assurance of Jesus you have been looking for. What does the other side of frustration look like anyway?

Jesus ON the other sIDE OF FRUSTRATION

I couldn’t think of a better example of Jesus on the other side of frustration than this Bible story I will share with you. Granted, there are many bible stories that could help us understand that Jesus is our assurance in all things, but this Bible story is still fresh in my mind, you can read it for yourself (Luke 5 v 1-11) or if you are a visual learner like me, watch ‘The Chosen’. Last Saturday I took some time to watch a few episodes of ‘The Chosen’, an amazing Bible story series by the way. If you haven’t watched the show, I highly recommend it, my sister’s in Christ suggested it and I love it! I had a chance to watch the story of Simon Peter the day before his first meeting with Jesus. I liked the visual depiction of Simon Peter’s many frustrations throughout the episode. But there are these two particular scenes that lead me to think about frustration and Jesus. The first scene that got my attention was when Simon Peter was out fishing at night. He like most of us usually decides to take matters into our own hands, the idea of control and the dare need to attain our desires leads us to many frustrating situations just like Peter experienced. Back to the story, with every attempt to cast his net and catch fish, Simon Peter grew more and more frustrated, he frantically cast his nets to no avail, he also had help, but even with the help of his brother and fisherman friends, nothing was caught all night. How many of us just like Simon Peter had the help, but we’re still left with the dealings of our long-term frustrations? Our inability to get to the other side of frustration is not always because we do not have the help, it is because we have placed a limit on how things should happen based on our initial desire to fulfill our goals. This is where Jesus comes in.

Going back to the Bible story, the other scene from ‘The Chosen’ that caught my attention was Jesus meeting Simon Peter right after a very unsuccessful night of taking matters into his own hands. Jesus then notices that the fishermen have toiled all night with nothing caught, he sees their frustration, he then asked if he can use their boat as a pulpit to teach a small crowd by the shore. With their permission, he continues to teach the crowd and once he was done, he asks them about their night, and you guessed it, they express their frustration of being unable to catch any fish. He, Jesus then instructs them to cast their nets again and at his instructions, they cast their nets again. Something miraculous happened, they caught plenty of fish! A night of frustration quickly turned into a joyous celebration for Simon Peter and his friends. How does this relate to us you ask? Think about the many frustrations that keep you up at night, only to wake up to them again the next day. What was Jesus trying to show Simon Peter and the rest of the fishermen? He was trying to show them that he is the assured help to all their frustration. He also showed them that on the other side of frustration is joy, peace, rest, and fulfillment. Their plan was to catch fish at night and that limited them to see that Jesus could help them catch fish during daylight. Jesus took the limits off their initial idea of attaining their goal and idea of control. So what is on the other side of your frustrations that you can actually look forward to? I already mentioned some, but let me list them for you;

  • Peace
  • Joy
  • Rest
  • Happiness
  • Assurance
  • Fulfillment

I hope this encourages you to see the other side of your frustrations, while I know the reason for your long-term frustration still lingers, there is a much better path you can take. The limitless path Jesus has set up for you. As cliche as this may sound, I feel like it is okay to say this right now, let go and let God! Here is the perfect assurance from God to you while you make your way to the other side of your frustrations;

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” 

Matthew 11 v 28- 30

All! not some…the verse says ALL should come to God with their frustrations and he will give them rest. Now that is a blessed assurance! I will end by saying these words, trust God by his word, and listen to his instructions especially when you get frustrated. God knows there is another side to all your frustration and wants you to see it. It is time for you to take your rightful place! It is time to trade thorns for crowns.

Much Love,

Xholiwe

Posted on by thornstocrowns

Holding on to Hope: Why hold on?

“I am sorry, mom is no more” My aunties sat close by me as they told me this and waited for my reaction. Denial quickly set into me and I asked, “what do you mean mom is no more?” then the news settled, my mother just passed away. I went into a panic and began to cry frantically, but that was not my state a few hours before this devastating news. A few hours before this I was holding on to hope that my mother would be healed from that illness. I said a prayer before taking a peaceful nap and held on to whatever small hope I had left, but this news killed the little hope I had stored up. I was hoping for a different outcome, but it quickly began to feel unfair and I remember thinking why did I even hope. Why did I hold on to hope when the situation was hopeless? What did the little hope I held on to do for me? I know those are a lot of questions, but I want to share on what holding on to hope can do for you even in the most hopeless situations.

I did a little research on Google and asked Google how many times the word hope is mentioned in the bible. Well, Google doesn’t know it all, but from the few numbers that came up it is at least over a hundred times across the different versions of the bible that the word hope is mentioned. It gave me much reason to understand the significance of holding on to our hope, I am certain that when God mentions a word over a hundred times, then we should know what it means to him. Hope like many other words gives so much meaning to one’s life, to many of us it is a core of our continued will to stay alive. Our plans, aspirations, desires, goals just to mention a few are encompassed by the word “hope”. As christians we find our confidence, strength and motivation is in the things we hope for. Let hope not be mistaken for a wish, hope is holds much weight than a mere wish. Hope is literally a pushing force that ignites our faith and gives us much reason not to quit. The unforeseen power of hope is that it is the peaceful reassurance even in the midst of a hopeless situation. That is why we must hold on to it knowing that in our hope there is reassurance that whatsoever the outcome, things are going to be just fine. I look back now to when I was told the news about my mother’s passing and think to myself, it was my hope that helped me endure the grief and loss of my mother. Also, it is now hope that reminds me that hopeless situations are not all the way hopeless if you hold on to whatever little hope you have left.

Anchored in hope

The purpose of an anchor is to keep something from moving, to stay grounded. When we are anchored in hope even though we did not get that positive outcome we wanted, our anchor sets us up to stay grounded in our belief in God and also reminds us that it will not always be this way. We hold on to hope knowing that our hope will see us through several other difficulties we may face in the future and we will not be shaken. Understandably, we have been faced with some difficult times in our lives, it could be the loss of a loved one, loss of opportunities to better our lives, just to mention a few. In those difficult times we have hoped and prayed for a positive outcome, only to be faced with a different outcome. Hope after the different outcome is what builds us up to persevere this halt or set back we are face to face with. It is important to stay anchored in such difficult times before we drift away into despair.

Why hold on?

The big question is why should we hold on to something that is not even certain? We hold on because our hope is the essence of our continued lives lived on Earth. By holding on we save ourselves from going into to despair (a state of hopelessness) from the many struggles we face and will face in the future. Have you ever met a person that let go of hope and you saw their despair? they don’t have to verbally say it because it could be felt. Despair just like many other undesired feelings comes because we let go of our hope. Therefore, holding on to our hope is important because it is what pushes us keep going on in this life long journey filled with many twists and turns. Again, holding on to hope is where you find your strength, you peace and your willingness to keep going despite all things. So hold on to it!

GOd and hope

You know I will not write a whole blog post without quoting the bible verse that speaks of hope and like the church girl I am, I find such joy in reading this verse over and over again especially when I feel like I am losing hope or I am getting low on faith.

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

Hebrews 11 v1

Hope brings about faith, both things that God desires we have in our lives. While we hope, we build our faith, is that not amazing? why not hold on to something that actually builds even greater faith within you for the things unseen. I believe God wants us to hold on to hope for several reasons, but mainly for him to fulfil his promises over our lives. God knows that our hold gives us confidence to even overcome the next (2 Cor 3:12). Another amazing thing about hope is that it brings us peace and joy (read Proverbs 10 v 23). It doesn’t end there, remember what I said earlier, hope is our anchor (read Hebrews 6:19). All the good comes from us hold on to hope, and that could be even the smallest hope you have left in you. hope anyway because;

For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees?

Romans 8 v 24 (ESV)

We are saved in our hope! Let that sink in the inner depth of your soul, especially if you have been not been doing well with holding on to your hope. If we saw it all we would hope, but then like the verse says, who hopes for what he sees?

In ending this post, I urge you to hold onto your hope in God, in your life, for your family, for your aspirations and for your healing (we are need it, trust me). Fight your way out of despair and hope again. What brought you to despair was not meant to keep you there and leave you there. There is hope in the things unseen and yours is to pick up on that hope and hold on to it and never let it go. It is time for you to take your rightful place! it is time to trade thorns for crowns.

Much Love,

Xholiwe

Posted on by thornstocrowns

Living with your decisions: The good, the bad and the ugly

Hello Crowned Royals! It has been a very long minute, but I hope all is well with you. I am doing well and just like you, I continue to work towards trading my thorns for crowns. I have been wanting to write on this topic for quite a while now, so hopefully my thoughts are still as fresh as I need them to be. Decisions, we all have to make them and eventually we all have to live with them. I am assuming that all my readers are adults and at some point in your lives had to make some major decisions, however big or small, the decisions were made and whether good, bad, or ugly, you lived with your decisions. So let us talk about talk about them!

Not so recently, I went to a restaurant with some friends, I was quite familiar with the menu and knew what was good there and decided on my order easily. My friends on the other hand were visiting the place for the first time and just like most first timers, they did ask what was good, I shared my suggestions, but allowed them to make their own decision. Despite my suggestions, they decided to go for something different and that was okay by me because they were first timers. Our meals were brought to the table and everyone dug into their meals, and immediately you could tell that not everyone was happy with their choice. I was quite happy with my chicken parmesan dish, but it may have been too late for the others to change their order so they ate their food regrettably. They envied by chicken parmesan and some even asked to have a taste of my good meal choice . You might be wondering, what does this meal story have to do with living with our decisions, well, all that is just a simple example with no major consequences of how our decisions eventually live with us. While you are not dealing with eating bland food that could not be saved by any amount of salt and pepper, you are dealing with major life decisions that come with major consequences and you would want to make the right decision with those ones. Throughout this blog I want you to think about your major life decisions and how you live or have lived with them.

Major Life Decisions and living with the them

What are major life decisions? These are decisions that can literally change your life for the good or for the bad. These type of decision impact our lives in major ways, for example, what state should I move to? must I make a career change at this age? is this the right person to marry? etc. Major life decisions are what you live with and unlike deciding on what meal at the restaurant, they are far more complex to be taken lightly. Major life decision require more thought and discernment. Unfortunately, we have more people making major decisions without understanding the complexity of their choices. Whether the decision is good, bad, or ugly the lack of understanding the complexity is what we end up missing overall. If you have ever had to make a major life decision, then you should know by now that not every decision is fun to make and if you are like me, you would rather make the fun decisions and skip those though ones. But unfortunately life does not work that way and so we also have to make sound decisions for even the tough ones because we eventually live with them too. For every major life decision you make, remember that it manifests in your life and how it manifests is what lives with you. How are you living with those decisions?

If you have ever had to live the consequences of your decisions, then you know what it is like to either be glad you made that decision or regret making that decision. We want to think making decisions is the hard part, but have you ever lived through the bad decision you made? Such torture, right? and even though there might be someone to blame, you still made that choice too. Once we get to experience this type of regret with our choices, we then use to to make wiser choices and live with better consequences. Easier said than done for sure, but what would you rather live with? the good? the bad? or the ugly?

Decisions, Decisions and More decisions…. does it ever end?

Just when you thought you made the right decision, here comes another decision causing you sleepless nights as you try to rationally figure out what to do next…been there? there right now? I think we all have been there or are there right now and the question is when does it end? I personally think it does not end, as long as we are alive, we will have decisions to make. It is quite easy to despise major decision making, but do you realize that so much power lies in you making your decisions. I think God gave us the ability to decide so that we are able to see the power our decisions have over us. If you are like me and have made some good, bad and ugly decisions, then you know the power of your decisions really impact your life. With the many decisions we have to make in our lifetime, we quickly learn that our decisions have consequences and those consequences are what we live with. Because decision making will not end anytime soon for you, how best can you make sound decisions and live with them in harmony?

Making Sound Decisions

There are several ways to go about making wiser decisions that you will not have to hating living with the bad choices. I know this because I have made my share of bad decisions and if I just applied some of these listed below things could have been different. I hope these help you too;

  1. Seek counsel- with God, trusted family/friend, church counsellors (pastors etc)
  2. Realize there is power in your decision
  3. Don’t allow fear to decide for you
  4. Learn from your bad decisions and don’t repeat them
  5. Never make decisions under pressure
  6. Evaluate your decisions

God and Decisions

Here is the exciting part of the blog, some assurance that all of us can appreciate as we make decisions. God wants to be part of our decision making, he actually delights in us seeking his counsel regarding our major life decisions, even the ones we consider small. God wants us to make good and sound decisions that allow us to realize the power our decisions have over our lives. He gives us freedom with our choices and that speaks of a lot of his love for us. As complex as decision making is, it is comforting to know that God is willing to help us decide, our job is just to seek his Godly counsel. Living with your decisions under God’s counsel is the ultimate goal. Allow him to guide and help you on which way to go and most importantly what decision to make. Making decision is already hard and can oftentimes leave you frustrated, angry, overwhelmed, confused, restless just to mention a few. So why then complicate your decision making by trying to decide on major life decisions on your own? Check in with God and see what he has to say about your choices. His word in Proverbs sums this all up beautifully;

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and never lean on your own understanding. In all of your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your path.

Proverbs 3 v 5-6

All in all, we can all admit decision making can be hard at times and can even be worse when we have to live with the bad choices we make. My final thoughts on this is that we do not always have to make the bad choices and learn from them later if we just start by making the right ones from now on. How do we do so? By not making these decisions alone! We seek counsel, we learn from past mistakes, we don’t take major life decision making lightly, we don’t allow fear to decide for us and we eventually decide on the right choice. It is time for us to make the right decisions and live with them. It is time for us to take our rightful place! It is time to trade thorns for crowns.

Much Love,

Xholiwe